Dealing With Break Up
Break ups are an emotional rollercoaster that are by no means fun on those along for the ride. Whether you are the person doing the breaking up or the person being broken up with, you are bound to experience a barrage of intense emotions.
During the break up itself, you may find yourself experiencing some different symptoms such as numbness, shortness of breath, increased heart rate, dizziness, nausea or vomiting. The symptoms an individual experiences will vary from person to person, however rest assured, you are normal. These are all symptoms experienced when something shocking or unexpected occurs.
This may be followed by a period of numbness, in which you won’t feel anything and you won’t know what to think. In fact, you may even deny that the break up has occurred. Again, this is quite common in most people.
Finally, you may find yourself becoming angry, depressed or both. Being angry or depressed about the end of a relationship is perfectly normal. It is a way of grieving that which we have lost. Embrace these feelings and allow yourself to act out in an appropriate manner. Cry on the shoulder of a friend or talk about your feelings. Whatever you do, do not take your anger out on your ex partner. This will only result in you feeling worse at a later stage and appearing small and petty to others. Just because you have been hurt does not mean you have the right to hurt others, even if they have done something to deserve it.
Allowing yourself to feel these emotions will aid in you accepting them and the situation and will ultimately allow you to free yourself from them and move on.
You will often hear people telling you that the break up was for the best and that eventually the pain will go away. During a break up this will not seem so, however it is important to keep it in mind. No one can tell you what to do or what to feel. It is important that you allow the emotions to flow in order to allow time to heal your wounds; and yes, unfortunately it does take time, these feelings cannot subside without you allowing yourself the time and space in which to experience them, accept them and consequently let them go.
It is important to remember to not blame anyone for the break up of your relationship. It is not your ex partners fault, it is not your fault, it is not the fault of anyone else. A break up is indicative that something was wrong with the relationship; if there is something wrong with a relationship staying in it would be cheating both partners out of another relationship that could be right for them.