How To Survive A Break Up

 

Break ups are a nasty business and it often seems like you won’t be able to come out of one alive. The feelings and emotions experienced during a break up can become so intense that you may feel that they could last forever and that there will be no end to the hell that is the broken heart.


Many of these feelings occur due to the embarrassment we feel from being broken up with. This is a natural way to feel and the only way to rid ourselves of it is to accept and even embrace the embarrassment in order to be able to let it go.


You may find yourself feeling angry and resentful to your former partner, again, this is perfectly natural. Allow yourself to feel these emotions, however be sure you only let your anger out in an appropriate environment. It is perfectly acceptable to cry, wail and scream in the privacy of your home or with friends: What is not acceptable is taking your anger out on your ex partner. Just because they have left you and you are hurting does not mean they too deserve to be hurt. Acting out on your ex will also make you appear small and petty to others.


Self blame is also a common emotion that people experience during a break up. You may find yourself thinking ‘What if I had of…’ or ‘Should I have done this…’; refrain from thinking thoughts such as these. The break up is no ones fault and there is nothing you could have done to prevent it. In fact a break up is indicative of the fact that there was something wrong with the relationship, so preventing the break up would actually be cheating you and your ex partner from finding the right relationship for you.


Eventually, your ex partner may find a new love interest. This will bring the wave of emotions back into play; again you may feel anger and resentment towards that person. Remember- allow these feelings to occur and express them in an appropriate and healthy way. Hurting is what makes us human, everyone hurts at some stage. Accepting that we are hurting and allowing ourselves to feel it will aid in us accepting the situation and moving on faster.


You will have good days and you will have bad days, remember to take each day at a time and allow yourself the time and space to come to terms with the situation. Once you have accepted the break up and the feelings you are experiencing, you will be able to move on with your life.

 

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